Mature Life Features

. . . in the doctor’s office yesterday

was going to give me a memo

but when she reached into her pocket

she pulled out a rectal thermometer,

which prompted her to explain,

“Some asshole has my pen.”

Boomers Retirement Wealth

Surpasses Predecessors

The initial generation of baby boomers who are now in their 70s have accumulated more wealth
at the same age than their previous generation, according to research compiled by the University
of Missouri-Columbia. The results do not support the commonly held stereotype of free-spending boomers.
Boomers have more than triple the amount of savings in stock funds compared with their predecessors. This could affect proposed Social Security reform that encourages even broader investment in
equities since the government program is designed to be a hedge against increased exposure to stock-market risk.
Researchers compared financial records of the first generation of baby boomers – those
born between 1945 and 1957 – with those of the last generation of pre-boomers born between
1933 and 1945.